today

even if nothing goes as dreamed and hoped for, I'll still be happy. I will.

strange thing happened today.
dressed in denim, turquoise layered tees and a tallow sweater. Tallow, a mix of tan and yellow. Would sallow then be a mix of salmon and yellow? Anyway, I called it my sea and sand look.

As I was getting dressed, I was considering the various issues with my apt. I am not looking for perfection, you see, but the night before, while it rained in my bathroom, a shelf I had hung on 2 nails came crashing to the floor, and with it, 2 large glass bottles of bubble bath and bath cream (liquid cream soap), which I had not wanted to open because they were much prettier in the bottle than in the bath. I don't go for Vanilla Mint. It reminds me of the tobacco my Dad used to stuff into his pipe, Not something I fancied soaking in. Now it was permeating the air, the puddle of slime spreading out on the tile with chunks of glass everywhere. The one bottle had hit the back edge of the tub and dumped it's contents within, which was nice being able to flush it all down the drain.

But the whole incident was annoying. Surely I was to blame for having hung that shelf with 2 little nails, but with the streak of water down that one wall, it probably had something to do with moisture. It was double the frustration, because not only had I lost my pretty bottles, but there was this stinking tobacco smelling mess to deal with. Like some old men's room. As I cleaned it up later this afternoon, I realized that the glass had shattered into smitherines. SMITHERINES. Minuscule shards which would catch my eye from every angle. Dangerous shrapnel. Just when I thought I had gotten it all, there would be a glint of light teasing me from places I could not reach very well. Unlikely anyone would ever come in contact with but annoying just the same. So now, the floor is so clean now that you could eat off of it, but you can't because of the glass fragments. Not that you would want to anyway.

As for the roof, my landlord, a pleasant man who bears a striking resemblance to Tom Bosley, was up here several weeks ago. He mentioned that they had had problems with the roof and that it probably needed to be replaced. Something about finding the time to do it. Haven't heard anything. I am sure he will get to it one of these days. Months. Years. He seems to be a very busy man. His carpenter also mentioned the time thing. I will probably mention it to him again. It's not like a huge thing... on the other hand, we've had an awful lot of rain.

There are these pine boards, something like a sauna, which hide the true condition of the ceiling and I am now quite concerned regarding mold. Mold has no odor but can cause serious medical issues. You can acutally have mold in the studs which doesn't manifest onto the sheet rock. This house was built in the mid 1700a. There's got to be something going on under those boards. Something hazardous.

A good reason to consider moving elsewhere. Not that I WANT to leave the farmlands. I love rural areas! Still..wouldn't it be nice, I was thinking, if I could relocate to another small town? A house. Ground floor. Near the beach. A dog. A yard. A garden. Washer and Dryer. A garbage can. (have to put it in my car now and drive it to a dumpster). Hmm...

I would really like to move to Allenhurst, a quaint little town near the beach. I now realize what I need in an apt. First floor. Laundry and Garbage pick up. No leaks. I was daydreaming about my ideal home, imaging how it would be. I could see it all in my mind. Suddenly it occurred to me that I could actually do this. Maybe I would start checking the Asbury Park Press for rentals. That's it. I'm gettin' a life. Not that I don't have one or anything...

Dropped over to the Hallmark store to pick up something for the Boss' Birthday. Got her a Sun and sand Yankee candle ( Ode de Ban de Solei) and a 'sun and sea' cheese cutting set for her beach house parties. Just what she needed. Right?

I get to my office. We are sitting there enjoying our lunch when out of the blue, my boss suddenly tells me about a couple she just met who own one of these big old houses in Allenhurst, and have a tenant moving out soon. The whole downstairs will soon be available. The owners are elderly couple living upstairs. As long as there are 2 separate entrances and they are respectful of my privacy, I could do that. I will do it. I hope.



but...and sometimes I feel guilty for saying it, considering all of the homeless and starving people in the world, but the desire of my heart would be one of those cute little bungalows with no elderly couple owners living on the same premises. Hey, didn't i just sell one of those? Whatever, however, I'll be happy no matter what.